Now that I'm no longer employed, I have the time to think about the important things in life like chewing gum.
I'm a big gum chewer (not sure if 'chewer' is a word; I'll spell check but I refuse to change it if it isn't), and I was excited when I read this article in yesterday's New York Times:
Executives at Cadbury Adams are hoping that no one will make such complaints about Stride, a new sugar-free gum the company spent three years developing. Marketed with a trademarked slogan, "The Ridiculously Long Lasting Gum," Stride has been engineered to remain pleasantly soft and sweet for many, many minutes, regardless of how aggressively it is chewed.
Inredible news for gum aficionados such as myself. The article goes on to talk about the engineering behind this wonder gum, but I won't reproduce that here. Eventually, they say the gum would remain flavourful for about eight minutes, which is quite long.
But, is that enough?
Consider that there are 1440 minutes in day; 10,080 in a week; 525,600 in a year. For me to have a pleasant gum flavour for entire day it would take 180 sticks; for a week, 1260; for a year, 65,700. Then consider there are 14 sticks to a pack: that means I would need more than 12 packs a day; 90 packs a week; more than 4,692 packs a year. Then consider that a pack of gum bought on its own (and not in family four-pack) can cost upwards to $1.50 (taxes included); a premium gum, such as this good-for-eight-minute gum, would definitely straddle the upward part of the scale. Considering all of that, my premium gum habit would cost me thousands of dollars each year. Of course, I have to adjust these numbers because its unlikely I would remain awake for an entire day, week, year. Consider.
So, with all this time, I'm going to go back to the drawing board (actually, I don't have one...I used to have an Etch A Sketch...that was close...here's an online one...where is this going?), and crunch some more numbers, and figure out all of this, and sit here, and wait, and write a bit more about this, because THIS MATTERS.
Yeah, it's easy to sit here and do this.
And what was I talking about? Yes, gum. That's it. Something.