Monday, November 27, 2006

The Guild

Don't Take This the Wrong Way; I Love the Union

It's hard to be happy when I stare at one of the various Canadian Media Guild bulletin boards around the building where I work. I'm a member of the Guild, who garnishes my wage in the name of the scam called "guild dues."

Most of my jobs have had unions I was stuck in: forced to pay a weekly or bi-weekly due despite not actually using any of the union's resources. At CP, it's much the same. Except I have one strong reason to hate the union. But that reason is unimportant, in the past, buried, gone; don't mention it, 'cause I really can't say.

That leaves me talk about the small reasons I hate the Guild. On the bulletin board, the Guild posted a propaganda letter about a recent survey of Guild members. The survey wanted to know what members wanted when the Guild goes back to bargaining.

So what do Guild members want more of? Guess.

You're wrong: Guild members don't want new Guild t-shirts (mine completed my "Jackass" Halloween costume last month).

Guild members want more money. Now that you've dropped back into your seat after that revelation, I can tell you that no fucking survey was needed to generate that answer. The Guild could have took a dumb, uneducated guess and still would have come up with the same result.

In the years I've been in unions, I've become convinced that the people who care most about their union, the people who are concerned with every breath and shit a union takes, are the people who know that without a union they'd have no guarantee of employment. If it was "Judgement Day," those people would be sent to unemployment hell.

But maybe I'm just a kid; maybe I don't understand how good it is and how much the union fought for me. Maybe I should apologize and add a retraction to the bottom of all of these shameful words. Maybe I should, 'cause you never know, someday, I just might feel like sexually harrassing someone. And then I'll need the union to save my ass.


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